Why Does This Keep Happening?

When you turn on the news, how do you feel?

When you think about how a human being can do something so barbaric, how does that make you feel?

When you hop on your social media and read people’s comments, what feeling does that create?

When you hear stories about the kindness, generosity, and heroic sacrifices of others, what do you feel?

Which of those feelings do you want to feel more of?

Is this going to be a blog post with only questions?

Allow me to answer that with a question: with so many people offering the same right/wrong, black/white, conservative/liberal opinions, wouldn’t it be nice to hear something different?

How can we bring more feelings of inspiration, love, abundance, joy, compassion, and meaning into the world?

What if each of us set out on our days to spread these feelings to others? What if we refocus our perspective of work, success, and life itself onto making the ultimate goal the spreading of those feelings?

What if, every day, we focused on bettering ourselves rather than being better than others?

What if, no matter the ideologies, opinions, and actions of others, we still responded with compassion and love?

How would your personal relationships be different?

Would your professional relationships become more personal?

What if we spent more time educating our children on kindness, working together, and understanding those different than us?

What if we were to measure our success by the number of people we serve?

What if we smiled more at strangers?

What if we accepted the imperfections of our humanity and laughed more at ourselves?

What if we looked at our differences in thought, belief, and action as opportunities to understand more about each other?

Would this make it easier to work together?

How could our different perspectives be combined to make the world a better place?

How would the world be different if we focused on solutions instead of the severity of problems?

If, every day, most people felt love, joy, compassion, abundance, inspiration and meaning, do you think they would want to inflict harm unto others verbally, emotionally, or physically?

What does that world look like?

How does that make you feel?

How can you share this feeling with everyone around you?

Can darkness exist where there is light?

Can fear, anger, bigotry, and hatred exist where there is love, compassion, understanding, and joy?

Does pointing out the faults of others show them how to grow?

Is fighting anger, hatred, and fear with anger, hatred and fear creating less anger, hatred, and fear?

What feelings does every human being strive for?

This keeps happening because we keep responding the same way. This has nothing to do with politics, being right or wrong, or even guns; it’s much more basic than all of these things. This has everything to do with being a human being, and the most human feelings we can feel are love, joy, compassion, understanding, freedom, kindness, and a desire to grow.

So what can you do to create those feelings within yourself?

What can you do, starting now, to inspire those feelings within others?

Start now. Share with others.

Let’s change the narrative and make the world and the people in it better together.

 

Why Y Should Be Your Favorite Letter

What’s your favorite letter and why?

Y is a pretty good letter. It’s not the best letter – that distinction goes to ‘D’ – but that’s only because I’m psychologically predestined to be drawn to the first letter of my name more than the other 25 letters. You are too. (https://psychology.iresearchnet.com/social-psychology/self/name-letter-effect/)

Anyway…

There’s just something about Y that really gets me going. Why? Maybe it’s because one of my favorite books is Start With Why by Simon Sinek. Maybe it’s the fact that if the Village People were to make their song about staying at the MCA, no one would ever play it at weddings since no one wants to go to the Motor Club of America. But the true reason is far more metaphorical: y is adaptable.

A, E, I, O, U… and sometimes y.

Sometimes? Y just decided to be a vowel sometimes? Y apparently ain’t nobody’s bitch.

At some point in history, the letter people (not the ones from the show, just a group of people who decided to turn sounds into symbols to make blogging easier) probably got into a heated debate about the letter. Chances are, there was a war that broke out in order to determine whether or not y was a consonant or a vowel, and the war ended in a stalemate, so in order to compromise, both sides agreed that y could be both.

Y transcends categorization and so do we.

We have this habit of shoehorning ourselves into categories because they give us an identity and make us feel safe, but they also limit our potential. Are you right-brained or left-brained? Lucky or unlucky? An optimist or pessimist? Once we’ve shut ourselves into a box, it’s hard to see beyond the cardboard, and even if you cut an eyehole in the side, you’re still limited to what you can see. Want to know why Republicans and Democrats can’t see eye-to-eye? They’ve trapped themselves inside of their own ideological boxes and cut eyeholes looking in different directions, so it’s impossible for them to see the same reality as one another. When we’re children, we’re told what we’re good at and urged to pursue careers involving those talents, then we go through our lives saying we’re “accountants,” “teachers,” or “HR representatives,” and stick within the confines of our job descriptions. This goes against our biology. Like the letter y, we aren’t meant to be confined – we’re meant to develop a diverse set of skills and perspectives so we can live lives of constant expansion, filled with new experiences.

Think of a category within which you’ve confined yourself. How is it limiting you? What new identity can you embrace for yourself that crosses categorical lines and is expansive, rather than limiting? Here are a few suggestions:

  1. Creator – When you are confronted with a problem, you quickly shift focus from the problem to what actions you can take to create a solution.
  2. Innovator – You look at seemingly impossible situations and remain steadfast in your belief that a solution is not only possible, but probable by combining old ideas in new ways or by creating new ideas.
  3. Opportunist – You don’t waste any time thinking about whether the glass is half-full or half-empty; you take the glass to the sink and refill it.
  4. Leader – You inspire others to transcend their limiting self-perspectives by example and are focused on serving others in order to help them reach their potential.
  5. Learner – Every moment of every day is a chance for you to gain new knowledge and grow into a more rounded person.

How can you adopt one of these identities today?

Nothing in this world is as neat or tidy as the manmade categories we use to classify things, including the manmade categories we made to classify things to make them neat and tidy. It’s weird. This is why Y serves as a reminder that we are neither consonant or vowel; we are what we make ourselves out to be. The next time you’re on an awkward Tinder date and you get asked what your favorite letter is, tell them Y because you’d rather not stay at the Motor Club of America. You’re way more complex than a fixed self-identity – you’re a friggin badass, but sometimes it’s hard to tell when you’re trapped in a box, so shed your limiting identities and be more like the letter Y.